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I'm Having An Affair

from I Can Smell The Asparagus by the stragglers

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lyrics

I'm having an affair
I keep complaining that my life's not fair
I'll blame it on quarantine
The same routine
And that I'm constantly looking at screens

I'm having an affair
I'm gonna find the perfect home wrecker
Maybe a divorce
On St. Patrick's Day
I know my colleague's always looking my way

Well I just got back from my daughter's dance class
Her teacher sure has a perfect round ass
Don't try this at home
It takes guts
If you're having an affair

Well I had an affair
I lost everything it's just not fair
I lost my beautiful wife
Ruined my son's life
For a cup of fun and meaningless nights

Oh I had an affair
People said we were the perfect pair
But like a movie scene
She broke the window screen
And threw my G.I. Joes into the street

It's a weekday, I'm back from my favourite bar
It helps me forget things I've done so far
I've got cans full of cigarette butts
As I wallow away in my rut
Don't try this at home
It takes guts
If you're having an affair

credits

from I Can Smell The Asparagus, released November 25, 2022

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about

the stragglers London, Ontario

People keep telling us we need to play more shows. We're so sorry. We didn't realize there are rules to playing in a punk band hahahaa

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